Friday, December 26, 2014
IT'S NEARLY 2015, BITCHES! Where the fuck did 2014 go? What a year! Let me say that again with some emphasis, WHAT A FUCKING YEAR! Congratulations on making it this far.
Now, the important question, where will you be boozing for New Years? We got wind of a few events that sound like a pretty damned good time...you might not even need to pack a flask (who am I kidding, ALWAYS pack a flask...add that as resolution for your 2015).
Check out Drink Philly's Craft Beer New Year where, for $75 you can enjoy an open bar, a dinner buffet (eat it all) and a champagne toast at midnight.
You know you want it, beer that is...you want beer.
If you were looking for something a little more...trendy, fret not there's a party for you. This year The Piazza's Masquerade, 15 at the Piazza promises to be a good time. Hopefully this crowd will do less 'pissing all over the neighborhood'. Part of the ticket sales benefit MS Society - that's right, start your year with a celebration and a pat on the back because you're boozing for charity, Bitches! With Tit's Handmade Vodka as the open bar sponsor, I'm fairly certain you'll be the best kind of drunk, not the kind of drunk who pees on things, and bones in stranger's driveways. Buy your tickets now for that event, starting at $85. Don't forget to hit social media when you buy your ticket #nyepiazza #cliquecities
New Years Eve celebration happening at the Blue Cross RiverRink Winterfest. Get in a good skate, then cozy up with some boozy refreshments.
Tickets are a steal at only $30 a piece for the 10pm-1am session!
I keep thinking about that terrible Katy Perry song...I'll have to drink more whiskey to make it go away. I feel filthy...I'm filthy.
Tickets are $75 and you can reserve your bunk for the sleepover. Reservations are a must and this event is family friendly. Family friendly might mean it's time to start on that flask resolution we discussed earlier. Extra points if there's a cat on your flask!
Stay drunk, Bitches!
Have a happy fucking New Year too!
Tuesday, December 23, 2014
But for me, there is a bright spot in this otherwise bleak, dead, wintry wasteland. All of the best dark beers are in season, especially my beloved porters.
I've been a huge fan over the last few weeks of the Magic Hat Winterland Variety 24 pack. I'm always a fan of variety packs because I hate committing to just one beer, especially if I haven't tried it yet. I know, I know- Magic Hat is kind of mainstream, but good beer is good beer!
Starlit Star Anise Porter. It has a nice strong anise-forward nose, and then the taste is a really nice mild anise flavor at the front and then progresses toward a silky, dark chocolatey finish. What I really love about this beer is that it could have been too sweet, it could have been too much spice, or it could have tasted like straight up black licorice (fucking GAG), but it didn't. It's super balanced and mild in flavor, and the anise plays perfectly off of its texbook porter backdrop. I will definitely be bringing a case of this to get drunk with my family on Christmas day.
The rest of the beers in the variety pack are pretty delicious too. If porters aren't your thing, you can try my second favorite, Snow Roller Hoppy Brown Ale. It still encompasses the flavors of the holidays, just with a little more of that hoppy bite we all love, and it's a bit lighter-bodied and less viscous than the porter.
So go out and pick up this great variety pack, and share it with someone you love this holiday season. Or drink it all yourself. I don't know your life.
Stay drunk, bitches!
...and Merry Fucking Christmas!
Monday, December 22, 2014
Wednesday, December 17, 2014
Clearly, with a boozy holiday fast on our heels this is great news! If you're a moderate drinker, you're probably helping yourself fight off those winter sniffles. At least we live in a time where we no longer need a prescription to booze.
Please note that we are in no way scientists...but it's great when science agrees with our lifestyles! WOOT!
Stay drunk, Bitches!
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Why not share some cocktail inspiration with Katie Loeb's book Shake, Stir, Pour-Fresh Homegrown Cocktails: Make Syrups, Mixers, Infused Spirits, and Bitters with Farm-Fresh Ingredients-50 Original Recipes. Katie is a favorite of mine, right now you can find her shaking up cocktails at the Trestle Inn a few nights a week. We're bringing shop local to a whole new level! With a forward by Jose Garces and 50 recipes to inspire you to experiment with your cocktails, this book is the perfect gift. If you're Drunk Bitch is also a fan of cooking at home, this is the perfect gift for them.
Saturday, November 15, 2014
|Just a bit of bitchy humor.|
If you know of a great resource or have an experience you'd like to share, please leave a comment.
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
We've all seen them- those condescending holiday party etiquette rules laid out by the Matha Stewarts and Clinton Kellys of the world. They usually contain some standards like, don't eat all the hors d'oeuvres, don't fuck your date in your aunts powder room, and the one rule that is ever present on every list- DON'T GET DRUNK.
We'll that, my friends, is fucking bullshit.
How awkward are family parties? For most of us, we all only get together a few times a year, and the older we get, the more distance we all have between us. Know what makes all of that go away? Booze! That's right. There's nothing like sitting around a table catching up with cousins you haven't seen since last Thanksgiving over a lovely bottle of whiskey or a few bottles of wine. Personally, I'm partial to the craft beers of the season, especially since winter beers are strong as hell, but you can get as creative as you want.
And let's not forget that there's always a ton of food at these get togethers. Remember when you were home from college on Thanksgiving break, hungover as hell from your night-before-Thanksgiving shenanigans? Remember how fucking good that turkey tasted after all that drinking? Most of us don't go out for "high school reunion night" (as I affectionately call it) anymore, but you can still get that same overwhelmingly satisfying feeling of drunk eating by actually, well, drunk eating!
The important thing to remember is that all parties are more fun when you're all drinking and enjoying yourselves. Why people try to shame us into making exceptions for the most wonderful time of the year, I'll never understand. And don't be embarrassed if you get a little sloshed. If you're reading this blog, chances are your family already expects you to be the drunk one. Just don't be the dickhead who shows up empty handed and drink everyone else's booze.
So go forth and drink, and have a wonderfully inebriated holiday season!
Stay drunk, bitches!