Monday, August 18, 2014

Seriously, Fuck Diner en Blanc

Let me first say that I am not writing this out of anger. This is not a butt hurt rant from someone who was one of the thousands who were turned away because of their shitty registration system. This event is just fucking stupid.

First of all, you need to be "sponsored" by someone already involved with DEB in order to even be eligible. Then, you pay $68.50 to reserve your seats for you and your guest, because you absolutely must register in pairs. Seriously, that's mandatory. And by "reserve your seats", they mean bring your own fucking chairs. I'm not kidding. You pay $68.50 to bring your own table and chairs, and it MUST be between 28 and 32 inches. Also, the location is of course not revealed until minutes before the event, so there you are, wandering the city in all white, carrying a table, chairs and all of your food/drink, waiting to find out where you get to haul all of your shit.

I know what you're thinking- "Sure, $68.50 is a lot to pay, but surely it goes to a charity or something right?" NOPE. Your money goes right into DEB's pockets. Per their website:

Is the Diner en Blanc associated with a humanitarianism or social cause?
What makes Diner en Blanc so popular is that it's a "distinct" evening. There are no political or ideological agendas and very minimal branding. Le Diner en Blanc is simply a gathering whose sole purpose is to create a magical evening, where guests are in good company, and in an environment which is both unusual and extraordinary. On a private level, hosts can decide to support any humanitarian cause they want, but not associated directly with Diner en Blanc.

Translation: We are greedy as hell and can't be bothered with the needs and struggles of disgusting poor and/or sick people.

Another bizarre tidbit I found while perusing the FAQs portion of their site is that men and women are required to sit opposite each other, for "photogenic" reasons. How nice of them to tell you where you are allowed to sit and eat your own food at your own table in your own chairs. This is an awful lot of shit to go through just to have a couple of cool photos for your Instagram. Luckily, same sex couples are not expected to adhere to this bizarre rule, 'cause DEB is progressive like that.

Also, if you're heading to DEB, make sure you pick up a white raincoat and a transparent umbrella (it actually says that on their website) as well because in the event of rain/snow/apocalypse, your ass is still expected to be there. If you don't show, you are blacklisted from registering for future events. That's right, DEB doesn't take any shit or listen to any excuses. Your ass is banned for life, son.

So, why do people continue to participate in this asinine, outwardly pretentious event? Maybe they are pretentious themselves, maybe they feel like it'll make them sound cool at the water cooler the next day, or maybe they just want some sweet Instagram pictures of 3,500 people wearing white and holding sparklers. I don't know. But this Thursday, instead of attending DEB, I'll be in my backyard wearing whatever the fuck I want, eating hot dogs cooked on my grill at a table I didn't have to carry anywhere. And maybe I'll even spring for a $3 box of sparklers for the occasion.

Stay drunk, bitches!

Update: The cost for Diner en Blanc is $68.50 per pair, not per person, and has been corrected.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

I'm sorry, did you just say Farm to Bar?

Sunday mornings are easy, laze about and ponder my brunch options, then put on some clothes head to my destination and stuff my belly with delicious. On occasion that means that I'm going to stumble over to Jerry's Bar (oh hey neighbor) and get a Croque Madame and a Bloody Jerry. Today was one of those days. Myself, my bruised boobs (don't ask it's a long story) and This Drunk Photographer headed to Jerry's to enjoy #ThisDrunkBrunch. While seated at the bar waiting for my food, our bartender took a few moments to tell me about an event they have coming up, and I knew very well that I had to share this with our Bitches.

Jerry's Bar, a Northern Liberties establishment, is having a Farm to Bar Dinner on September 3rd. 

For only $65 you get 4 courses and 4 pairings with a walk through of each course by Greensgrow farm's Kate Kelly and Yards' Kristin Caine.Most have become a fan of the, getting back to basics 'Farm to Table' trend and with the growing popularity of CSAs and more accessibility to farmer's markets filled with local growers it's hard not to. Now there's a pairing that has that love of local in mind and we're pretty excited about it. 

wers it's If you didn't have plans on September 3, you do now! Check out the facebook event and join in, and don't forget to RSVP! They encourage giving them a call (267)273-1632 or sending over an email to Tickets are limited so get on that now! 

Stay drunk, Bitches! 

Monday, August 11, 2014

Decibel Wines USA Release Party and the Beautiful McCrossen's Tavern

It's not everyday you hear a story about a person who picks up, moves to another country and starts training to follow their dreams, and yet that's the story of Daniel Brennan and his Decibel Wines. A New Jersey native who once managed an indie rock band, turned himself into a wine maker and moved to New Zealand. He returned home this trip to debut and tour some of his most recent wines and This Drunk Bitch was at the launch party hosted by McCrossen's Tavern.
McCrossen's Tavern, a family owned bar and reastaurant in the Fairmount section of Philadelphia. In fact it's Daniel Brennan's own family who are the proprietors of the warm and welcoming tavern on 20th just south of Spring Garden.
We showed up a bit early for the tasting, and were seated at a table in the dining area for the first part of the adventure. This was a first visit for both myself and Tara so we spent much time eagerly looking at the menu and checking out the fixtures. The dining area is a great space, I love the fireplace (though it's useless in the summer), the peeakaboo windows that allow you to see through to the bar and the warm wood floors.

This event was a special debut of two new wines for the Decibel label and included pairings for each of the 5 wines available . The new vintages were the 2014 Amplified a bold and sassy white that I quite enjoyed and a 2013 Pinot Noir that was surprisingly refreshing!

We decided early that we were going to need to try each of the pairings because neither myself nor Tara had
been to McCrossen's before. We started off soft with the whites and their pairs. The Sauvignon Blanc and Scallops got us started. The scallops were cooked to the perfect temperature and the tomatillo sauce had a spice to it that really brought the dish full circle, the ideal pairing for the vintage.

Next up was the 2014 Amplified and Shrimp Ceviche. On its own, the 2014 Amplified was great- bold and tart with just a little sweetness. Also, the ceviche was really delicious too- bright and acidic, and I loved the punch from the radish and the cool, smooth finish of the avocado mousse. However, we weren't really crazy about the pairing. I thought it brought out too much sweetness in the 2014 Amplified and made it feel very one-note, which this wine most certainly is not. I will say that I give McCrossen's an A for effort though, as that wine does seem it would be difficult for pairings.

Give those wines a swirl and a sip and we are onto the red pairings. 

Our third was the 2011 Pinot Noir paired with Duck breast. The duck was cooked really perfectly, served with an herb salad and lovely cherry jus that was pretty good on its own, but the 2011 Pinot Noir really made it sing. I can usually take or leave Pinot Noirs as I find them to be a little too light and sweet for my tastes, but this one was very unique and more complex than most Pinot Noirs I've had. The sweetness in the jus allowed a lot of the savory fruit notes in the Pinot Noir to shine through.

I really feel like we saved the best for last in this instance because our final pairing were both our favorite things! The Smoked Tomato Tartare and the 2011 Malbec. Oh sweet baby Jesus, the way that wine complimented that delicious tomato tartare is exactly what these pairings are for. Stand alone the dish was perfectly rounded, but then you take a sip and a swish of the Malbec and the flavor profile gains this complexity that was so beautiful. It's pairings like this that wine snobs dream of and McCrossen's and Decibel delivered. - Please note I'm not a wine snob, I'm a food snob and a whiskey snob and a drunk bitch. 

I absolutely loved the 2013 Sauvignon Blanc and I'm not the biggest fan of whites. I could just see myself sipping on this perfect chilled white wine on a summer night. Keep in mind these words are coming from someone who is not typically a fan of whites. I like my wines like I like my fellas- strong, spicy and with a big finish. *wink* However, I really enjoyed this vintage and I will be drinking it again, soon. The absolute hit for me was the 2011 Malbec, it was probably the most perfect red I've had in awhile. I drank way too much of it, as did Tara and This Drunk Photographer. We were giddy on wine and it was lovely. Mmmmm Decibel Malbec. - S

I am also going to agree that the real winner of the night was the 2011 Malbec. I'm a huge fan of bold, viscous wines and this delivered in a big way. I do like a number of white wines as well, and New Zealand Sauvignon Blancs tend to be one of my favorites (especially when paired with scallops!) so I was really in heaven with the 2013 Sauvignon Blanc. The pairings were very enjoyable, starting light and refreshing and finishing bold and smoky. It appears that Sue and I have very similar tastes in wine, which I'm sure will make for several wine-drunk adventures in the future.  - T

After our tasting, we decided to hang out at the bar and let This Drunk Photographer do what she does. She nabbed some really beautiful photos that you can check out on our Flickr. We also took some time to chat with Daniel and his brother Jamie who are both very fine fellas. Charming, gracious and funny, we were so glad to make their acquaintance and thrilled to have found McCrossen's which we both plan to visit again soon for dinner and several drinks. Always several drinks! We also noticed that McCrossen's has a pretty attractive little Happy Hour Menu which includes items like $3 Duck Fat popcorn, $5 select wines and a $6 Classic Negroni.

Stay drunk, Bitches! 

*Disclosure - our tastings were compliments of Punch Media
but all opinions are our very own, honest, albeit drunk opinions. 

Thursday, August 7, 2014

The 4th Annual MGK Brew Blast is coming!

Get your towels ready, it's about to go down
Everybody in the place, hit the fuckin' deck
But stay on your motherfuckin' toes
We runnin this, let's go
-The Lonely Island

Are you ready for a beer festival ON A BOAT? This September, 102.9 WMGK is hosting the 4th annual Brew Blast on the deck of the Battleship New Jersey. Not only is it the absolute perfect time of year to drink outside, but there is something very special about enjoying a cold one several cold ones right on the water. It looks like last year's event was a huge success. This Drunk Bitch will definitely be there, and if you have a brain in your head you will be too.

Here are the details:
The 4th Annual Brew Blast on the Battleship NJ is Saturday, September 6 from 1 to 5pm.
Tickets are $45 for General Admission, $20 for Designated Drivers and can be purchased here.
All tickets include a free tour of the Battleship New Jersey!
Because it's WMGK, you can expect to see personalities like John Debella, Debbi Calton, Andre Gardner and Ray Koob, as well as live classic rock all day courtesy of the WMGK House Band.
There will also be a big ass tent for the sissies who hate the sun.

This year's Brew Blast will feature over 50 craft beers.  Previous brands have included:
Blue Moon, Brooklyn, Dogfish Head, Firestone Walker, Goose Island, Great Lakes, Heavy Seas, He’Brew, Harpoon, Jacks Hard Cider, Just Brewing Project, Long Trail, Magic Hat, Manayunk Brewing, Ommegang, Oskar Blues, Port City, Prism, Pyramid, Redd’s,Saranac, Shiner, Sierra Nevada, Sly Fox, Smuttynose, Starr Hill, Stoudts, Tuckahoe Brewing, Unibroue, Victory, Weyerbacher, Woodchuck, Yards.

So, to recap- 4 hours of live music and over 50 kinds of craft BEER, all on a historic ship on the very scenic Delaware River. So we will just plan to see you there.

Also, rumor has it that we may be giving away a pair of tickets or two. Stay on top of all the updates using #BrewBlast.

Take a long hard look at the motherfuckin' boat!
Stay drunk, bitches!

Friday, August 1, 2014

THIS DRUNK GIVEAWAY! Bitches love to win!

Last week Doc Magrogan's invited us out to give their cocktails and oysters a try. It was love at first shuck. The space is amazing, the service is over the top and the oyster lamps are something I want in my house. Check out our review when you get the chance, or do it now. Seriously, those Little Bitches were the tits. Now they've given us something to share with you bitches!

We're giving away a pair of tickets to Doc Magrogan's Lobster Bake and it's an event not to be missed! Not only will you get to stuff your face with delicious things to eat and drink, but it's also to benefit a great cause, The Marine Corps-Law Enforcement Foundation.

Now the best part of all of this, is that This Drunk Bitch will be in attendance. If you haven't met us, you're in for a treat. We'd love to chat and drink and drink and drink and eat.

Dying to know how to enter? It's simple! Just take advantage of the easy entry Rafflecopter below, take a chance at one or all of the entry options then cross your fingers and wait!

If you can't wait and don't want to risk missing the event, you've still got time to buy tickets in advance.

Note that you can tweet about the giveaway EVERYDAY for extra entries.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Thursday, July 31, 2014

This Drunk Bitch meets the Little Bitches at Doc Magrogan's

Last week, This Drunk Bitch was invited to check out Doc Magrogan's Oyster House in University City. Carlos, the manager, was incredibly gracious and made sure we got to take in the full experience, including allowing us to sample some of their delicious food and drinks.

We were introduced to Adam, a bartender who claimed to be a whiskey expert. So, naturally we had to test him by asking for two "surprise me" style whiskey cocktails. Side note: All of this dumb shit floating around the internet lately about how you should never ask your bartender to "surprise you" is fucking bullshit. A good bartender loves to show off his/her skills and will be happy to create something for you based on your tastes. But I digress. So anyway, Adam's cocktails were actually incredibly delicious. He really is a whiskey expert. Sue's drink was tart and very whiskey-forward, as she made it clear that she loves whiskey, and mine was much more demure with a hint of sweetness. Adam described it as a "gateway whiskey drink", and I think he's right. He also makes a mean Bloody Mary, complete with a shrimp garnish. Can all things be garnished with shrimp from now on?

The Happy Hour Menu includes a great assortment of appetizers for just $5, including the crab arancini which is just lovely.

We also were treated to a lovely Oyster selection. We both agreed that the Little Bitches seemed to be the most delicious. They were absolutely perfect, and not just because of their awesome name. And did you know the oyster menu changes every day? It's because they get fresh oysters every day. Every. Fucking. Day. They are also very generous with their buck-a-shuck specials, offering them on Mondays from 4-10pm, during happy hour every Monday-Friday from 5-7pm, and my absolute favorite- a late night buck-a-shuck special on Thursdays from 10pm-12am. That is seriously genius. I know what I want to do every Thursday night from now on.

Doc Magrogan's is also absolutely beautiful inside. First of all, it's SO MUCH BIGGER than it looks from the outside, with three floors of several dining rooms, each with their own unique vibe. There are also two private dining spaces on the third floor that can accommodate larger groups of people, and will soon be home to an oyster shucking class. Don't worry, bitches, we will make sure you are all the first to know when that comes up. Also, can we talk about how gorgeous the oyster shell chandeliers are for a second?
With all the oysters I plan on eating here, I'll be able to make one of these bad boys in no time!

I also hear they have a Lobster Festival coming up. Stay tuned for more info on that coming your way!

*Disclosure: our cocktails and light bites were compliments of Doc Magrogan's, but all of the opinions are ours and can't be bought!

Stay drunk, bitches!

Monday, July 28, 2014

Holy shit, whiskey is a lie!

That craft distilled Kentucky whiskey you're drinking right now could have come from a mass distillery in Indiana according to this article from the Daily Beast. MGP a factory whiskey distillery seems to have a pretty heavy corner on the market. While some brands take the factory created whiskey and add a bit of spin to it, most don't. They simply market it to us as something they gave life to and we suck it down like the lie that it is! DAMN IT! WHO CAN WE TRUST?!

If whiskey is a lie...I just...I quit? How can I trust anything ever again? Whiskey, my beautiful spirit, is a lie.

A pretty extensive list of companies using MGP for their craft distilled whiskey which the article points to is on Recent Eats
I get the whole micro brew, craft spirits craze, but really how shitty to misrepresent yourself. Ugh now I've even got to google whiskey before I order it. Damn you all! Can't a bitch just get whiskey drunk? No, because America. 

I also found myself getting a good laugh, because many of the whiskey brands mentioned in that article were present at the shit show that was Whiskey Rebellion, which I fucking hated, and still hate to remember.

Stay drunk, Bitches!